Ciao, first five!

Well, today marks a week since I started keeping the Food Diary, and I’m down five pounds!

It really was an easy transition, especially since I got a lovely little black moleskin-like journal that fits perfectly in my purse so it’s always at the ready to record.

One of the things that definitely helped me was being mindful of my feelings, whether they were hungry, tired, stressed, etc. Because I took that extra moment to consider whether I was really craving that greasy option at Friendly’s or I just let too much time pass between my meals, I made the right choices by going with one of their new diet-friendly (and really tasty, actually) options. Find out more here.
They even have a low-cal sundae, too, because everyone knows you really go to Friendly’s for the ice cream!

All in all, I’m pretty happy with the past week – I didn’t get a chance to exercise as much as I would like, but I think I’m off to a great start – that might finally be the start of something that sticks.

Nikki

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There it was, blowin’ in the wind

It’s been a pretty rough few months that included, but is not limited to, the out-of-nowhere illness of my beloved that pretty much put the world on hold, job shit that I’m sure everyone can relate to and the pretty detrimental practice of Letting Myself Go.

While I regret – greatly – the fact that I LMG, I did so for the right reasons to take care of my aforementioned beloved through the past few months because 1. It’s what you do when something like that happens, and 2. It wasn’t even a question because, after all, he is my beloved.

I took on things that I never dreamed I’d do, and in turn, feel that finally at almost 34 years of age, I’m a bona fied grown up. I’m in a grown-up relationship, I’m doing grown-up things, I have a grown-up home, I have a grown-up future.

But by putting myself on the back burner, I did a disservice to myself. I know I can handle everything – and hopefully anything that gets thrown at me from here on out – but I won’t be able to if I’m not feeling good about myself or if I’m feeling sluggish because I’m carrying around extra weight.

To be a fighter, you must be in fighting form.

Today when I walked outside, it hit me.
Thought part of it might be the icy temperatures that seemed like a slap in the face after yesterday’s record-breaking 50+ degrees, but I digress.
I need to take care of me. I can take care of me while taking care of someone without feeling or being selfish. I have to take care of me now more than ever.

So as I walked to my car on this frigid, blustery day, I decided to start a food diary. It’s something that’s always worked in the past for me when I was doing Weight Watchers on my own at home to keep track of points, but now, I’m going to put into practice all those suggestions I’ve read in articles in Shape and Self.

I’m going to write everything I eat – alongside what I’m feeling when I’m eating it. I’m a chronic binger when things get crazy around me. I don’t know why, I just am. Keeping a food diary will help me reel that in, hopefully, and hopefully help me make the changes I need to make to be the best, healthiest me I can be so that I can be the best to the people I love.

As a longtime journaler, this should be an easy task for me, and I look forward to starting. Not tomorrow, but starting with today’s oatmeal and the salad and sandwich I’ll have for lunch.

Keeping such a log of what I’m eating will surely inspire me to not write things like “Housed an entire bag of chips in one sitting,” “Just ate five slices of cheese” or “Inhaled a dozen medium wings,” which I admit has definitely happened more than a few times.

Instead of binging mindlessly, a journal will allow me to think about what I’m eating and if it’s the best option. Sure, I’ll find myself at our favorite wing place on occasion, but instead of “inhaling” a delightful dozen, I’ll get six and counter it with a salad, and soon smaller portions will become second nature.

I’m dedicating time to myself everyday – be it just a stroll around the block or a kick-ass session on the Air Climber – something, anything that will get me moving, clear my head and give me a moment to focus on someone important: Me.

This way I can still be here for the people I love when they need me, and most importantly, when they don’t because really, those are the best times of all.

Nikki

This blog should be called ‘Sit, Nikki, Sit.’

I should really change the name of this blog to Sit, Nikki, Sit, dontcha think?

But despite being discouraged – and feeling pretty down about myself lately – I got back on the Air Climber this morning for the first time in probably two weeks.

I had to, especially after I stepped on the scale for the first time in as long, too.

Sure, I have a thousand excuses, and they are very convincing when I’m still laying in bed after choosing snooze over sneakers, but in reality, they all seem pretty flimsy.

No, they all are pretty flimsy excuses. Stupid even.

Like most women, I think about my body a lot, mostly in dislike, which I know is just as unhealthy as my eating habits. A lot of times, I sit there and lament, getting inspired to exercise at the oddest hours, like bedtime or when I’m at work and it’s not an option.

Yet as unhappy as I may be with myself, I plum haven’t done anything about it. And that’s what makes it even worse.

Hopefully today’s good stint on the AC will get me back on track. I’m going to try as hard as I can to not get waysided with snacky goodness watching my Steelers (hopefully) bring home ring No. 7 tonight during the Super Bowl – but if I am weak as I’ve been known to be, I guess I’ll just have to pick myself back up again and keep trying until something clicks for me – hopefully once and for all.

Nikki